From the moment I first met Shirley we both knew she would die soon. That was the reason I was there. Consequently that was also the reason we never had an unimportant conversation. Every word held weight. Yes, there were many laughs, and seemingly benign topics, but each and every moment knew what the outcome would be.

I was there to help Shirley with her bucket list. It was specific and precise. That was Shirley. She had built a very successful world for herself and her family. She would die on her own terms.

Shirley loved to travel and told me of all the places she visited around the world nothing could match Long Beach Lodge at Cox Bay on Vancouver Island. Nothing.

That’s why after Shirley passed I went to the lodge to hear her voice again.

Sitting here in the Great Room I feel Shirley’s echo in every corner.

This is where she was happiest and it’s like the essence of her joy is embedded in the wood and rocks and the people.

I look out at the waves and know it is exactly what Shirley would have seen.

My first visit here was tentative and unsure. Much like my writing back then. Now it all seems like home. And with that a deep comfort.

I still type on the laptop Shirley bought me. The one she gave me as a parting gift. I helped write her memoir and before she died she wanted to help me write mine. I smile as I type this because Shirley spent her life empowering people and I had the good fortune to be her personal trainer and her friend.

I still think of Long Beach Lodge as her discovery. I’m blessed to have followed her path to this place.

I still drink Blue Buck, the first beer I had in the Great Room. I still stop at the Starbucks in Port Alberni on the drive across the Island. I still order the burger on my last night here. I still take way too many pictures.

I swear the logs on the beach are the same ones I’ve been looking at for the past six years… but the storm and the ridiculous high tide yesterday reminded me that not much of this vista is permanent.

My writing is based on memories. They have taught me to be open to stepping away from the norm.

People say memories are made and memories are shared. Well memories can also be given.

Shirley gave me the memories I’m making today.

All the incredible people at the Long Beach Lodge are carrying on with that tradition.

 

 

 

No wonder the frenzy has set in. We are three weeks into 2016 and all those resolutions are falling apart. Some might have already crumbled.

If I hear one more media report about our health and fitness I might puke. People go on and on about what we can do and what we can buy to help us achieve our goals.

I just listened to a “fitness expert” talking about the new trend with all the fitness trackers available to people… and how many people got these for Christmas. He spouted about the benefits of step counts and heart rate measures.

He forgot to highlight the most important factor.

YOU HAVE TO MOVE!!!

Nothing will change and you won’t get better, fitter, healthier or happier unless you get up, move your butt and make a change with what you do each day.

I have a Fitbit and love it. But it doesn’t change the fact that if it’s raining outside and I still have 8,000 steps before I make my daily goal that going outside and putting in the effort is tough. I’m going to get wet. I would much rather watch TV and eat cheese. Cheese can easily trump a Fitbit unless I make the commitment and follow through.

How many people bought gym memberships and only went once? How many people have treadmills that haven’t been turned on in years? How many people are still fat and sick?

I’ve given talks on the subject and they’re short and simple.

Everyone is an individual and what works for some people might not work for you.

If you want to lose weight, eat less.

If you want to get fit, walk or run and lift weights.

If you want to feel better, drink at least a liter of water a day.

If you want to sleep better, go to bed and don’t do things that will keep you awake once you are there.

Consistency, consistency, consistency.

And most important… do something that makes you happy. Not something that just brings you pleasure: we are talking about real happiness.

It’s simple.

And it’s extremely tough to do.

But it’s worth it.

So move.

Years ago I shaved my head to support a client going through chemo. The drugs were a poison and wreaking havoc on her body. Luckily the drugs also poisoned her cancer.

Being a bald woman impacted my life in ways I would not have guessed. To this day I can still detect the traces.

On January 1, 2016 I stopped eating sugar for many of the same reasons I shaved my head.

A client was being poisoned and she needed some support.

Such is the life of a personal trainer.

I’m not a health nut or exercise fanatic. I’m just an older woman not in denial.

If you put crap in your mouth then your will pay the price. If you don’t move you will pay the price. If you come up with endless excuses why you need to hold on to your bad habits you will pay the price. It’s pretty basic.

But changing habits are tough. And it’s especially tough if you have an addictive personality.

I have an addictive personality. (If you regularly read my blogs you might have noticed this.)

It’s easy to discover that refined sugar is bad for you. Do a quick google search and the wave of terror starts. Or should I say tsunami? Sugar = Poison.

Except for the other known fact that the so called “experts” don’t seem to understand.

Sugar tastes fantastic. Dairy Queen Blizzards taste fantastic. Milk chocolate covered caramel tastes fantastic. The plethora of yummy flavoured yogurts tastes fantastic. Pumpkin spice lattes taste fantastic. (Am I sharing a little too much personal information right now?)

Sugar makes you happy!

To stop putting sugar in your mouth is hard. If you’re going to do something that will take all your resolve and willpower it is much better to do it with a buddy.

My client and I know someone that did this last year and can see the benefits. She looks great and oddly enough… she seems happy. (We secretly hate her and are jealous.)

On the sixth day of no sugar I physically feel no better. But on the sixth day of supporting a friend I do feel a little happier.

Not as happy as if I was supporting a friend while eating a Caramel Cheesecake Blizzard… but life is not always perfect.

 

 

It’s not very Christian of me. It’s not very kind of me. God knows it’s not very Canadian of me… but every time I hear or see another news story about the Syrian refugees I scream “Fuck off” and change the channel.

In the next breath I say, “What about the others?”

I can’t imagine the pain it must be to the people waiting for acceptance into our great country to feel they would’ve had a better chance if they had started their trek in Syria. Or when they do arrive they find that having the label “Syrian” attached to their papers would mean multitudes of welcoming gifts.

The bias and discrimination embarrasses me.

My Facebook feed is filled with the ongoing catastrophe in Nepal with the perfect storm of an earthquake and political mayhem. People are dying. Children are dying. I know many living there and see the devastation. It’s become personal.

Kathmandu has also taught me that destruction beyond our belief is going on all the time. It’s everywhere.

And no, we can’t help everyone. We just can’t.

But when we do open up our doors, let’s not show favour and decide which people landing on our shores deserve the bigger hug.

A wise friend tells me that the powers that be are making sure the discrimination we see on the news is not the full story. All refugees are getting help. I only wish our Prime Minister would remove the word “Syrian” next time he makes a statement about the refugees. Or better still, why doesn’t he go to the airport and personally welcome someone from Ghana?

I’d be pleased and proud and joining the chorus if every news story these days was about how we were welcoming all refugees into Canada.

For every man, woman and child, no matter what your colour, religious belief or nationality… if you are a refugee and come to Canada you will be equal.

I sense the tide is turning and more people are noticing.

I hope so.